The tabloids are ruining my life and I feel like the whole world is judging me. I feel so alone. What do I do?
I feel you. Who ever wants to feel judged, period, end of story. And, then, to feel judged by the whole world is something that nobody is mentally prepared for, ever. But there are a few things that might be able to help. So, first and foremost, unfortunately we live in a society where there’s this addiction to judging and comparing. And so, when you’re used to that in a society, people are doing it all the time. And it’s this kind of high that people get from being able to put other people down to make themselves feel good. So if you can start to kind of wrap your head around that idea that, you know what, people judge and compare and do this out of weakness. It’s not coming from love, it’s not coming from goodness, it’s just coming from that pure, human weakness of feeling low and requiring something lower to make yourself feel better, then maybe you can learn to not take it so personally. Because, you know, the glass is both half full and half empty at the same time. There are plenty of amazing, wonderful things about you. But there’s also plenty of things that people can pick at, and point at, and try to look for that aren’t so wonderful.
So if you can get comfortable with the idea that, unfortunately, in this society, people are looking for those half empty parts to really make themselves feel better, then you can understand that it has less to do with the fact that those are parts of you and more to do with the weakness of human nature. And number two is just to try to have compassion for these weaknesses, to understand that it’s not necessarily intentional, it’s not necessarily because people are bad, it’s just that we’re in this cycle of this kind of yucky behavior. And that it’s okay that you’ve got some not so pretty things about you and you don’t have to be ashamed of them, because everybody else does too. So, if we’re in this environment where people are looking just for those things, to point out about you, because it makes them feel better, you know what, you don’t have to get stuck in that yucky cycle, you can be above it and learn not to take it personally.
So in sum, number one, try to understand human nature, and two, try to have compassion for people’s weaknesses. You don’t have to get sucked in.